


this life

by watergator



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-19
Updated: 2018-07-19
Packaged: 2019-06-13 04:05:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15355830
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/watergator/pseuds/watergator
Summary: dan bumps into his ex girlfriend in sainsburys on a thursday evening





	this life

It’s that weird moment when two people catch eyes and stare for a moment, both lost in their own minds trying to figure out for where the hell they recognise each other from. Dan gets used to people stopping to look at him like that; but he’s usually not also the one staring back.  
  
It’s not until she breaks first, doing a little jog walk thing towards him with a wide toothy grin, does it click for him,  
  
“Holy shit.” Is all he can say as she comes towards him, and she laughs, “Holy shit, Erin, wow.”  
  
He cannot believe he’s stood in Sainsbury’s gone half eight on a Thursday night, here with his ex-girlfriend from almost ten years ago.  
  
She laughs again, almost unsure of what to say and Dan can feel it. He’s so used to nervous energy and him having to sometimes take the lead in a conversation. But this isn’t just another shy fan; this is Erin. His ex, Erin.  
  
“Shit, this is so weird.” Dan laughs, looking at her properly this time. She’s still the same. But not really. She’s older and her hair is different, obviously. But overall she still looks like the eighteen-year-old Dan remembers. Dan wonders if she’s thinking the same about him.   
  
“I know, I know,” She finally says and just her hearing her voice again is enough to knock Dan down with a wave of memories. It’s been so long since he heard her voice.  
  
“So, uh, what’s up with you? What are you doing here?” Dan realises that as soon as he’s said it, it sounds stupid. He can feel the blush begin to grow under his skin.  
  
Erin looks down in the basket she’s got in her hands and Dan looks down too; there’s a can of baked beans and a packet of frozen smiley faces potatoes and a bottle of vimto. She always preferred it more than ribena.  
  
“Oh you know, wild night in.” She laughs, hoisting the basket up as if to show it off before letting it fall again. Dan snorts,  
  
“Yeah, looks like a very, uh, fun kinda meal,” he looks back down at the basket, “you clearly know how to have fun.” He laughs and she laughs back,  
  
“Yeah, either that or my son is a very picky eater who only likes his potatoes in the forms of human faces.”   
  
It makes Dan’s heart stutter a little under his chest. Her son?  
  
“Oh my god, you have a son?” His voice comes out a little high pitched and squeaky but he doesn’t care. Erin had a _baby_?  
  
She nods, “Yep, he’s three now. Finally, over those terrible twos’.” She rolls her eyes and Dan can only nod slowly, feeling a smile spread on his lips. He seriously can’t believe Erin is a mum already.  
  
“That’s so crazy.” He says out loud, almost breathlessly and Erin grins, looking proud of herself,  
  
“I’m surprised you didn’t know. My Facebook is practically my shrine to him. I don’t think anyone who’s friends with me knows what _I_ look like anymore.” She jokes and Dan feels a little bad. He hasn’t really cared much for keeping up with old friends on his personal Facebook; he remembers the long nights he’d spend crouched over his laptop, freshly dropped out of uni, watching everyone from his previous classes living the life he didn’t have; how much time he wasted watching everyone live their own dream lives. But it wasn’t like that anymore.  
  
“Oh, uh, yeah, sorry, I uh-“ Dan’s not sure what to say but she just barks out a gleeful laugh, easing the tension,  
  
“God, Dan, I distinctly remember telling you not forgetting me when you got all big and famous.” She winks, and usually saying the words ‘famous’ would be enough to make Dan squirm but he knows she joking. They’d joke about it back when Dan was young and still teetering on the idea of even filming a video, let alone upload one.   
  
“This is still so weird. I can’t believe you’re a grown up now.” Dan shakes his head in disbelief.   
  
It feels weird; the last time he really saw Erin they were eighteen and they were playing ps2 in his room, just before she left for uni and she still had the ends of her hair dyed a cool electric blue. Now she was somebody’s mum. Part of someone's family. Dan glances down at her hand, looking for a ring, but when he realises it’s absence he opens his mouth before he can think,  
  
“Are you married?”   
  
Erin shakes her head, “Nah, never was one for big fancy shit, you know? Me and Jack are pretty okay just the way it is.” She says and Dan nods, following along,  
  
“Jack?” he asks curiously,  
  
“Yeah, Jack. We met in uni actually. Just after you.” She smiles sweetly. He can’t remember if she ever mentioned a Jack in the last few weeks that they spoke before they drifted apart. But either way; he’s happy for her.  
  
“That’s really great, Erin.” He smiles, and it’s genuine.  
  
“So, how’s Phil?” She asks, and it comes out a little rushed and he guesses that perhaps she was waiting for him to bring him up, but he can’t help but notice the curious expression that  creeps up over her face,  
  
Dan nods, and swallows a little thickly, “Yeah, yeah, Phil’s great, thanks. We’re doing really great.” He smiles, maybe a little too wide. It’s sometimes nice to gush about his boyfriend to someone who knows about them; nice not to hold back the fondness that bursts out of him at the mere mention of his name.  
  
“Still sickeningly sweetly in love then?” She laughs, voice low and cautious and Dan pauses, smile still stuck on his lips.  
  
He forgets that there was that weird time between Erin and Phil; a part of him that was a bit muddled. It’s weird to think there was a time before Phil knew of his existence that he and Erin would sit together on her couch and watch the odd video of Phil’s. It was kinda weird that Dan would gush about his future boyfriend to his then girlfriend; even weirder that she was stood here talking to him about him.  
  
“Of course.” Dan croaks, feeling a rush of emotion sweep over him. And Erin smiles, so sweetly and caring. There’s no hard feelings here. There never was.  
  
“I’m happy for you both, you know.”   
  
Dan looks down at his basket; it has a carton of almond milk and two large bags of popcorn.  
  
“Thanks, Erin. You too.” he nods to her.  
  
They stand there for a while in the quiet isle of Sainsbury’s before Erin takes a step back, breaking away,  
  
“Well I better get back before Aaron throws a tantrum about what he will and won’t eat.” She says looking down at her basket again and back up at Dan.  
  
Dan huffs a laugh, taking a step back too, “Yeah, I may not have a toddler yet but trust me if I don’t get back to Phil with his popcorn I’m sure he’ll be having a similar kind of tantrum.”   
  
That makes Erin laugh, like really laugh. He misses it. But only slightly.   
  
“Kids, huh?” she laughs.  
  
“A nightmare.” Dan laughs back.  
  
“It was good seeing you Dan. Take care, yeah?” She says, and with that she turns the corner and she’s gone. Dan doubts he’ll ever see her again unless it’s a rare coincidence such as this, but he supposes that it’s fine. He doesn’t move until he feels his phone buzz against his thigh in his pocket.   
  
He fishes it out to see a text from Phil,  
  
_phil: if u ran off with a sexy stranger in sainsburys and abandoned me hungry and alone forever and ever i will be very upset :( hurry home pls?_  
  
Dan laughs to himself. He looks up to where Erin had just been and back at his phone. He has every inch of reason to sometimes feel nostalgic for the past at times; to sometimes wonder what could have been. To wonder that maybe in another lifetime he’d be waiting at home with his son Aaron waiting for his wife to return home with their son’s dinner.   
  
But instead he has this life. He has the most incredible boyfriend who is sat in their home hungry for popcorn. It’s a life he wouldn’t trade for the world. It’s the life he chose and one he loves. This is his lifetime and he wouldn’t want it any other way. And if he could do it all again, he'd chose this life, a million times over. 

**Author's Note:**

> come say hi on tumblr !! @watergator


End file.
